If

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If I…

If he…

If you…

If we…

If only…

I had said the right things,

Done the right thing,

Been the right kind of compassionate,

Maybe then we wouldn’t be counting maybes.

If I had…

If you did…

If we said…

If they had…

If only…

Time had slowed even infinitesimally,

And space had materialized between us and this situation,

Maybe it would have gone down differently,

And we…

Would be chasing more than the possibility of reconciliation.

If I…

If he…

If you…

If we…

If only…

Hindsight was not so sharp,

Foresight not so bleak,

Memories not so vivid,

This would be an easy sort of thing,

And you and I would not be ruminating on ifs.

If I had…

If you did…

If we said…

If they had…

If only…

You heard my ifs,

And I heard your maybes,

When we tossed them at each other like weapons,

Eager to return fire,

But never to listen to the themes upon which they flew.

If only…

If was something real…

If only…

Maybe weren’t the thing of innocent dreams,

And childish constructions.

If only…

Ifs were real…

If only…

They weren’t as fragile as daydreams.

If only…

I believed in if.

If only…

 

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About Michelle Toussaint

Michelle Toussaint is an Antiguan who has amassed an Associate Degree in Science Education as well as a Diploma in Forensic Science. As such, she Teaches Science in the classroom as well as at home, where she leads...er... co-leads The Tribe. A merry band comprising her Husband-The Chief, herself-The Priestess, and her three precocious children- the tribesmen. When she isn’t mothering, teaching, being a fangirl or feeding her chocolate addiction. She writes two blogs. Random_Michelle and Death By Expectations. View all posts by Michelle Toussaint

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